Siesta Summer Study Weeks 1 & 2
Beth put up the video already, so here ’tis. Topics for discussion are included in the video and also in writing below.
Siesta Summer Bible Study (Weeks 1 and 2) from LPV on Vimeo.
1. By now you’ve been well introduced to the concept of the study. We’re cleaning out our thought closets. On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you individually need this particular subject matter and why?
2. Look on p.13 at the quote in the margin: “Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing.” In what way did that statement resonate with you? What struggle do you most tend to define yourself by?
3. Look on p.23, Day 4 of Week 1 at the interactive where Jennifer says, “In your own words, describe worry.” What was your answer?
4. Go to p.44 in Week 2 and focus on the part of the study where Jennifer talks about “faulty assumptions.” I thought this part was incredibly insightful. What is one of your faulty assumptions?
Once we’ve had the chance to discuss this for the next 24 hours or so, I will prepare a summary comment for the group and post it on the LPM blog. Can’t wait to hear what you ladies were shown these last two weeks!
1.) It actually has surprised me how much I have needed this study. I didn’t doubt that the subject matter would be relavent to this particular time in my life, but I didn’t realize what it was really going to get at…I know we tell ourselves lies all the time and the mind is such a struggle, I think, especially for women. My husband and I moved from everyone and everything we have known. We have not found a “family” to get plugged into and we have come out of major hurt and disappointment from our previous church family. The relationship I have had with a girlfriend since early childhood has basically gone to nothing and even family relationships are strained. You can begin to tell yourself lots of lies when times are like this and that’s what I believe was happening. So this study is extremely pertinent to me individually, right now in life.
2.) The quote “Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing” really hit me. (I think I might post it somewhere prominent in the house so I do not have a chance to forget it!! :0). When I really got to thinking about that, it was freeing! I guess I mostly define myself by the struggle of feeling unloved/alone/not fitting in. I don’t mean like a superficial kind of not fitting in, but so different from even your family that it makes you feel these ways. Does that make sense? Feeling unlovely has been a real struggle, too. (Jenn, when you posted a comment about day 3, it just made my heart cry for you. Thank you for sharing it with us! How Beautiful our God is to “tend” to us, like Beth said today!)
3.) I think worry is being actively scared (really scared) over just about anything. So deeply anxious that it affects how you live, think and respond to life and its circumstances. Especially with circumstances that we do not know the outcome!
4.) If someone “hurts my feelings” repeatedly, they cannot possibly love me.
1. (I think we’ve all had a chance to share this one during the past 2 wks) By now you’ve been well introduced to the concept of the study. We’re cleaning out our thought closets. On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you individually need this particular subject matter and why?
I would say Glory that I am about a 5 or 6. I would have totally put myself at a 10 before. But these past 2 years I have been in God’s spiritual bootcamp. I came to nepal thinking I would serve God and change those around me. Instead I came to know God and He changed me. You see I knew I had “stinking thinking” in America.. thoughts that were not honoring to God… but instead of battling and fighting them with the truth I could easily ignore them by running to something that made me comfortable. But God brought me all the way to Nepal where I had to give up everything that made me comfortable. I had nothing to run to and had to confront the thoughts in my head or go crazy. God has taught me much about the battlefield of the mind and fighting it with His truth.
2. Look on p.13 at the quote in the margin: “Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing.” In what way did that statement resonate with you? What struggle do you most tend to define yourself by?
I would say I tend to most define myself by my overeating habits. That is the habitual sin I struggle with often. When I fail in that area I often tell myself well I am a defeated failure, there is no hope for victory. It’s awesome to remember that because I struggle in this area does not make me a defeated failure.
3. Look on p.23, Day 4 of Week 1 at the interactive where Jennifer says, “In your own words, describe worry.” What was your answer? \
Worry is thinking on and meditating on the What If’s.
4. Go to p.44 in Week 2 and focus on the part of the study where Jennifer talks about “faulty assumptions.” I thought this part was incredibly insightful. What is one of your faulty assumptions?
One of my faulty assumptions is I most be loved by everyone.
I tend to gravitate towards thinking that I must make myself stand out by being perfect or no one will notice me. I grew up with an identical twin sister (who is my best friend in the world) but she and I looked so alike people saw us as a unit instead of individuals. I so longed to be seen as an individual. Sometimes I still have to work through the assumption that I do not have to be perfect to be KNOWN.
1. By now you’ve been well introduced to the concept of the study. We’re cleaning out our thought closets. On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you individually need this particular subject matter and why?
10….I needed this study because my mind is full of negativity, it never comes out, everything is always great to anyone who is not in my family.
2. Look on p.13 at the quote in the margin: “Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing.” In what way did that statement resonate with you? What struggle do you most tend to define yourself by?
Very much so! I struggle right now with my weight, and it makes me feel insecure, defeated and unattractive, my health is not good because of it, BUT it shouldn’t change who I am, but it seems to bring about alot of “stinkin thinkin”.
3. Look on p.23, Day 4 of Week 1 at the interactive where Jennifer says, “In your own words, describe worry.” What was your answer?
I had put worrying about things that might never happen. I loved Beth’s analogy.
4. Go to p.44 in Week 2 and focus on the part of the study where Jennifer talks about “faulty assumptions.” I thought this part was incredibly insightful. What is one of your faulty assumptions?
Basically the same as Beth’s …that if my husband loved me there are things he wouldn’t do, he wouldn’t throw his clothes on the floor, he would consult me about things, etc….
So funny! I didn’t read anyone’s post before mine so my answers would not be influnced I did listen to Beth, then I posted and read Jenn’s and Michele’s…..look at how similar they are….I guess most women have the same issues…makes me feel better….not that you have issues…LOL…just that I am not that different!
1. For the first time in a long time I am a perfect 10. And wouldn’t you know it would be on a scale like this? Sad but true. I really need this study.
2.I have struggled with my weight for years. My life revolves around what I can find to wear and how bad I think I look. I have gotten to the point that I don’t socialize because I think everyone is talking about how much weight I’ve gained. This study has helped me to realize how negative I’ve become in my self-talk.
3. “Worry” for me is trying to be God to myself, trying to figure out how I can control (manipulate) situations that I actually have no control over rather than realizing it’s all in His hands.
4.One of my many faulty assumptions is obviously that I assume everyone is watching me and passing judgment. In reality, I believe if I just realized how few people even care what I weigh–or how poorly I’m dressed or that I’m having an bad hair day–I could get over myself and enjoy life a lot more.
We (women) are so funny. I have really struggled with my weight, too, and go through the same “emotions” and thoughts as I have heard from a few of you, but you want to know the really funny part? We have all looked at the pictures we have sent to Sarah and I have seen comments about how we think each other are soooooooo beautiful!! What a kick!! We NEVER see ourselves like others do. Not that being healthy isn’t important, we ARE the “temple of God” (I Cor. 3:16) and we are to be good stewards of what He has entrusted to us, but when I see other women love God and desire to be closer to Him and be so honest about what they struggle with in their walk…Man, is that beautiful!!! That’s all I see!! And from some of your all’s comments on the pictures, I think that’s all you all see, too!! But since this is a REAL struggle for many of us, I feel you all, we will pray for each other!!
Sorry this is such a rush and not quite finished.
1. On a scale of 1-10 do I need this bible study–boy do I! 10!
2. Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same
I feel like at work I feel I have to be someone different and I struggle with not being good enough. At work I feel I have to act like everything is okay in my life even when it isn’t.
1. On a scale of 1-10 I am at a 10 on this one.
2. “Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing.” O.K. Honestly, this one I am having trouble wrapping my head around. a) Being 50 is who I am. When you see me this is evident. I do struggle, big time, with the age issue. b) I am overweight. Again when you see me this is evident. I have stuggled with this issue most of my adult life. To tell myself you are getting old and fat is not a lie. It is a struggle. Every single meal. Going out to eat. Birthday cakes etc. ????????
3. Something that consumes my thought life-leaving little room for much else. It is a constant mulling over situations and trying to resolve them in my mind.
4. When great Ladies retreat is planned at church. I expect loads of ladies to attend. (We had to cancel because we did not have enough sign up) When a new Bible study begins with 20 women, I would like to finish with close to 20 not just 4. I guess I expect commitment from others. Is that a faulty assumption?
AM I THE ONLY ONE?
1. By now you’ve been well introduced to the concept of the study. We’re cleaning out our thought closets. On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you individually need this particular subject matter and why?
I’d say I’m a 10 here!!! For years I’ve wrestled with some major issues related to, for lack of a better term, my concept of self. And during that time I have become increasingly hyper-critical of myself and, as my insecurities have deepened, of others as well. So like a couple of you have already mentioned, this study is hitting home in the conversations I have with myself, but also in my other relationships.
2. Look on p.13 at the quote in the margin: “Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing.” In what way did that statement resonate with you? What struggle do you most tend to define yourself by?
I underlined and starred this statement as I worked on this day. I desperately need to internalize it!!! I have always struggled in relationships, particularly friendships with other women. Because those friendships have always been challenging for me, I have taken on the “terrible friend” persona as who I am, rather than seeing it as something I struggle with.
3. Look on p.23, Day 4 of Week 1 at the interactive where Jennifer says, “In your own words, describe worry.” What was your answer?
Worry is becoming preoccupied with the “maybes” of life in an unhealthy way.
4. Go to p.44 in Week 2 and focus on the part of the study where Jennifer talks about “faulty assumptions.” I thought this part was incredibly insightful. What is one of your faulty assumptions?
My biggest faulty assumption is thinking that everyone expects me to have it all together, to have all the answers, to be perfect. My children must be perfectly-groomed and well-behaved, my husband and I must have a constantly-blissful marriage, the house should look like Martha Stewart is running the show and on and on. And as for me, I should be totally secure and unquestioning in my faith, at my ideal weight, perfectly-coiffed and dressed at all times, always ready with witty and/or deeply spiritual conversation, wanting nothing more than to spend time with my family, etc. If this isn’t true, I’m not a good wife and mother or, worse, not a good Christian. Faulty would sum it up nicely, don’t you think?
Hi Siestas,
This is a great study- I am home recuperating from a knee arthroscopy done on Monday. I have received my workbook and am now caught up! I watched Beth’s video and will briefly make my comments:
1. I gave this a 7, because I have been working on my thought-life now for a while. I am sure it is always an area of my life that will need continual maintenance, so I am so happy to actually have a process to use, thanks to Jennifer. I have already learned so much to help me get out of the problem and into the solution.
2. I so often struggle with my many roles as a public classroom teacher. Now I know that what I struggle with is not who I am- hallelujah! I do not like having to be a strict disciplinarian, mainly, and the job demands this so often that I end up feeling really bad about myself, thinking “this is just not who I am”. Now I understand this!!
3. Worry: a state of not believing God or allowing Him to handle the things in my life that He is perfectly capable of handling and I am not!
4. Often, one of my faulty assumptions is that I am not a “good enough teacher”. Through this study, I have learned that the roots of this fruit are pride, perfectionism and insecurity. I am now ready to cut this one off at the roots with the power of God’s Word!
1. I’ll say some where between a 8-9. I’ve been surprised at how often I’ll catch myself talking bad to myself.
2. When we’re struggling with something we have to act like everythings okay, even when its not and its hard not to let that overtake us.
That I’m not good enough.
3. Thinking about the what if’s.
4. That people won’t value my opinion and if I speak up I’ll be ignored or it will be considered a ‘dumb’ answer.
My dear favorite new siestas….
I want to thank you so much for your prayers for me in my last days in nepal. I so wish that you could have been here with me during some of the most precious moments of my life. But I feel like you were here with your prayers. It has been an incredible snapshot of heaven. God has graciously allowed me to see the works that He did through me here in the past 2 years.. at least a small portion of it. God does so much more then we could ask or imagine. I cannot stop weeping over the goodness of God. 2 years ago I came here a girl who thought I could change the world. I then quickly realized that I did not speak the language, did not understand the culture, did not really love the people on my own. Then God gently broke me and sweetly whispered through the circumstances when I was thinking what in the world am I doing here.. I CAN CHANGE YOUR WORLD.. your world. What a personal God. So for two years I feel I have seen God doing that in so many precious ways. Through the difficult times like this winter as we refer to it as the cold dark winter when we had only 2 hours of power a day.. or when churches were bombed, or when I missed my family, or when my grandmother died, or in the sweet smile of a begger child, or in the true worship of the nepalese people, or in the laughter that seems to follow wherever I go ( I love to laugh!) God CHANGED me. I love that He loved me enough to bring me here to do that.. and in the process I got to see Him use an empty broken vessel like me. I found such joy in the serving God. People often ask me how I did it. I must say a resounding It was the most difficult 2 years but most amazing because Jesus walked right beside me.. He gave Joy in the deepest darkness.. peace and I met Him– Jesus My one and only. He was the lover of my soul, my father, my family– and if anyone says a christian should not have fun serving God they are wrong. I had a blast.. the BEST times of my life. I felt more alive here, laughed more here, danced more– because I let Go here and let God.. or rather God sweetly asked me to let Go and take hold of Him– the one who calls me beautfiful, the one who notices me, who I don’t have to super serve or be perfect for.. the one who I don’t have to ring a bell to wake up in the mornings like my hindu neighbors, the one who I don’t have to worship in the form of an idol and wonder if He is even listening– the one who would never ask me to sacrifice my life to try to become something better in the next life (I saw a human sacrifice here, a man burned alive to try to become something better in the next life).. a Jesus who GAVE His life so that I might LIVE! ok.. i’m going to stop preaching now. Sorry I just needed a place to process all the praise thoughts going through my head.
So thanks for praying for my last weeks. With my friend getting saved, getting to speak in church completely in nepalee unprepared– that was a language 2 years ago I knew no words in at all, getting to do all the “last meals” with my friends.. it’s been a glorious picture of heaven for me.
Now if you could remember me in my journey and pray for me. It’s a long one. IT takes about 48 hours to get home.. and i really don’t have any layovers. I leave here tommorow at 2:00, then fly to Thailand. Get on a plane directly after landing in thailand, fly 17 hours to LA airport. Please pray me through that airport. I have an 1 1/2 to get through customs, checkc and re-check my luggage and get from the international airport to the other one.. by myself.. only a miracle of God can get me through that on time and I know you guys can pray that for me.
Pray for me as I enter a world that is not home to me anymore.. pray specificaly for no reverse culture shock.
I love you siestas. Sorry this was so long.!
I am praying for you , dear Jenn- for ALL of your requests. It is a joy to know you through your posts.
Me too, Jenn. I’m praying for safe travel and that angels go before and behind you. You are one neat lady.
Dear Siestas,
I just was reading day 3 week 4 about strategy 2: Accountability. I need a bible buddy. I have no one. I have been praying for “Divine Connections” for quite a long time now. In fact I got so upset after reading “call a bible buddy” that I slammed my book down, started to cry, and said “I don’t have anyone to call Lord, how am I supposed to do this?
So, it came to my mind…after my little fit…(so not pretty) that if I didn’t have anyone to call, then maybe someone in our group is in the same situation. Jennifer says “Don’t isolate yourself–it isn’t safe.”
So siestas would you pray about it? Maybe there are several of us who need an accountability bible buddy…maybe we could pair up in twos?
I hear ya, Sharon! I am in the same boat! No one I know is doing the study (except you all – I know you guys, now! :0) So, I am up for anything. You are NOT alone!!
Thank you Michelle!
When you posted about weeks one and two in here I was amazed. Your situations and comments… except for the moving away part… could be me. That’s why I didn’t post. I could have just said “See Michele’s post…ditto for me.”I had a situation about five years ago where I felt I had no one. I did not move away but I felt so isolated. I’m not going to go into details here but I had fiery darts coming at me from every direction. My sister(who was my best friend) another really good friend of mine..my Mom..my husband..and on and on. It took years before I could think about it and not cry.
But I know now that God used that time of turmoil and feeling like I had no one to touch my heart. That is when at the age of 49, I asked Jesus into my heart and began a very personal relationship with Him. Oh how I praise him for that now!
Feel free to E-mail me…I hope you will… I think all of our addresses are on the prayer requests that Sarah sent out. And if it’s ok I will do the same.